Another sunny hot humid day, probably the most hottest so far. Perfect day for long walks! The streets around here are full of trees. Pretty much everywhere we have been you can see greenery, either trees lining the streets or a bush covered hillside.

I have been introduced to the mini-baguette, which is amazing with cream cheese (in the little pot). The little sausage things with onion are so good too, little bit of spice and so tasty. So many things that Louie has said we should cook, or ways to prepare things I now understand. There are daily occurrences of me going “ohhh, now I get it”. The little thing on the side is like a mini Chelsea bun, but with tropical fruit in it.

Louie’s desert course at breakfast, madelines, brownies, cake, chelsea thing and mini butter biscuits with guava jam in them.

Our first stop was Parque Lage, a park / gardens and mansion at the foot of the Corcovado (Jesus stands on top of it). You can actually walk up to the top from here, but that was a solid NO from us. It started as a sugar mill in the early 1800’s and was eventually converted to a public park. Like good tourists, we spotted a queue outside the mansion and joined. After a good 15 minutes in the sun we were wondering what we were queuing for, since all we wanted to see were the garden walks. Louie did some investigating and discovered the queue was for the mansion which only lets in 60 people at once. Given the number of people having extended sessions of bad posing for photos we’ve seen at other places, it was no wonder things were taking so long. A quick exit of the queue and we were away into the gardens. This turned out to be a pretty wild path due to some collapsed walkways so we went bush / jungle. Good thing there aren’t any bugs or animals in Brazil that can harm us…

The laundry used by the slaves, ingenious design but pretty grim history.

Once we had scaled a hillside via tracks, over logs and up broken steps we found the main path. We realised a bit further on that we could have gotten up here much more easily just by following an earlier path, but our way was far more interesting. We came across a group of teenaged boys on a school trip and were interrogated for our names and where we came from. I got to use my “nao falo Portuguese” and then tried to answer their questions anyway. They seemed mildly impressed by our origin and then moved on to the next tourists. A brush with local wildlife!

This tower was all by itself, and it took some pretty dodgy paths to get to the top and into it. I managed to navigate around it without hurting myself, if not quite vaulting one handed over the rocks. At this point in my life, I’m counting not breaking bones as a win.

There were a few monkeys living in the trees, and it’s so different from back home to see them living in their mostly natural habitats. I’m sure the people living in the houses that back onto the park probably don’t feel the same way. I can imagine leaving a window open and finding a monkey shitting on your laundry wouldn’t be the highlight of your day.

There are signs everywhere to not feed the animals living here, and it seems to be working. This guy was just having a look for food in the trees and ground bush, and didn’t take any notice of us. If people had been feeding them, they would be constantly grabbing at people for food.

The mansion sits below Corcovado, which seems to be visible from every damn where. They certainly knew what they were doing putting the statue there, Jesus sees everything. Unless it’s cloudy, then he and the tourists see bugger all. As per usual, there was a queue of people lined up to take their posed selfies in front of a fountain and the mansion. Quite happy to be not included in that (or any) trend.

After the Parque Lage we Ubered deeper into Rio, towards (but not to) the Maracanã Stadium, home of Brazilian Football according to a poster. Instead we walked through the Quinta da Boa Vista Park which was slightly more arid than the photos on Google which showed lush green fields. This was more North Queensland Summer grass. It’s a big open park, with a few drink carts scattered about and very few visitors on a 35°c day. We were considering hiring a two seater bike thing but the first part was straight up a hill so that was a big Nope.

The big museum here is closed but the grounds were nice, at statue of the son of a King faced the entrance and a favela in the distance. An example of the close proximity of the rich and poor that is everywhere here.

We had lunch at the Restaurante Quinta da Boa Vista which is modelled after a traditional Portuguese house, with the staff wearing uniforms stylised after the servants’s uniforms. Here is the chap that stands out the front and points to the menu that is clearly visible to anyone approaching. He has one job, and does it well.

In a city of extremes, today we were to experience the extremes of food and service. This is how the drinks were ordered were brought to us. I only ordered one beer, but they provided a second in the ice bucket just in case I wanted a second. Thoughtful, convenient and increases the likelihood I’ll drink it. Spoiler alert, I did not.

I hadn’t seen this beer before on the menu so I gave it a go. It was fine, but didn’t make me want to dance like a jester.

Sorry Sharon, lunch once again was carb heavy with very little in the way of leafy greens to be seen. The sausages were fantastic, and the chicken and pork were great. Beef was pretty gristly which was strange for such an otherwise higher service place. Yes, the rice and fries were plated up for us, expertly done with a fork and spoon used like tongs.

I spotted this chap outside during lunch, they seem to be where it’s the hottest. So far seen in the car park of the Grand Canyon, mid-summer of Times Square and now an inner city park in Rio. Funnily enough I don’t remember seeing one in Disneyland!

We went into the Rio Zoo which is in the park, and it was pretty standard and quite small. Auckland Zoo is far larger and better set out, with much larger enclosures for the animals. You could see they have been trying to improve things, and the animals themselves looked in good nick, not missing legs or eyes.

They had a couple of pythons which are always neat to see, and definitely less terrifying than the crazy Australian snakes that live in rafters and drop down on you.

The absolute highlight of the zoo is the bird enclosure, with many McCaws bombing around the place, making a hell of a racket. Being native to Brazil, there was at least one outside the cage so I’m not sure if it had escaped or was just a local come to visit.

Toucans! I’m so glad I got to see these guys in real life, some of my favourite birds.

For dinner we come onto the worst of the day, trip and since 2022 really. The only saving grace was they got the drinks right. Everything else was just so wrong. It started out with the woman who greeted us in a voice that could shatter glass in volume and tone. I’ve had fillings more soothing. Without pause she showed us how the touchscreen ordering system worked, not asking or giving us a chance to explain we were familiar with the concept, having lived somewhere with electricity for some time. None of the options had any description, but she ran through them all so fast we couldn’t remember which was what and how. I did remember that she said if we wanted the burger cooked well done to let her know. That one I did remember, clearly having seen and been involved in the process of extracting and testing ground beef for bacteria levels. Fully cooked thank you very much. As you can see above, it wasn’t an appealing sight, the burger looked as if it had been boiled, not grilled and the smell of the “cheese” was more like merda de cachorro. Fucking dire. Of course when I started eating it the sight of the moist bubbling pink burger meat was the last straw. Back into the wrapper and into the bag. I’d have to satisfied with the soggy chips. Oh yeah, the burger bun was all soggy and mushy too.

The painful host came by to check how our meals were and I said it wasn’t good, it was well undercooked. She bent down and in the most kindergarten teacher voice said “oh no, that’s not good, how can I make it better”. I gave her a look and said she can start by not talking to me like a five year old. I definitely declined her offer of another burger, there’s only so much one person can be revolted in one night.

And then Louie discovered the extra bacon he ordered wasn’t in the burger. He called her back and she tried to tell him the onion was the bacon. That was the last straw for him and into the bag his burger went and off we went to our next debacle.

If you’re ever in Rio, avoid T.T. Burger, it is absolute tits.

Just up from our hotel is a local place that I wanted to try out called Sindicato do Arpoador. Since we were still hungry we headed there. The guy running the place was pretty surly and pretty much the opposite of the other places we’ve eaten at, so we where aghast at having to open and pour our own drinks and put our food onto our own plates. Outrageous.

Tomorrow is the last day it’s supposed to be sunny in Rio, so we are planning some downtown visits to different places.